One of the most overlooked steps in the Charisma Arts Method is getting information.
It is your responsibility to drive the interaction. However if you are blindfolded no one is going to get into your car. I certainly wouldn’t get in a car with someone driving blindfolded. This manifests in interactions all the time. Her boyfriend is nearby, she is driving everyone home tonight, she is still living with her ex, etc. If you don’t find out about all of these things, she will not feel comfortable with you driving the interaction either.
“How do you all know each other?”, “Who are you here with?” and “What’s your relationship status?” are all important questions you can start with to gather information.
I see so many guys wonder why a woman is not committing to an interaction, to have him turn around and see her walk over to her boyfriend. You have to get information if you want to escalate an interaction anywhere. Don’t wait. Bring it up fairly quickly in the interaction and put no weight on either the question or the answer. It is just another topic. Remember there is no bad response. Information though, is power.
Drive the interaction with your eyes open. Know where you are going with the interaction and you will be able to avoid the monster potholes.
3 comments:
Yes, very important. This was my sticking point in some past few interactions.
This topic is more important than it may seem.
Key things that it took me a while to realize:
- girls WANT you to know that info about them
- they expect you to ask it (sometimes they will offer info, but usually they will just wait for you to ask)
- if you ask, you're don't come across as needy, nor weird, but as considerate of her and her friends.
A few different thoughts come to my mind, on this subject.
1.
They also want to know your situation too. You need to be ready to answer the same questions: who you're here with, your relationship status, etc. And use SPECIFIC DETAILS. Don't beat around the bush. If you ask details from them but only offer vague things about you, you won't seem mysterious, but noncommitted.
2.
Since girls like you, they give you lots of IOIs without being aware that they do it. They can't help it. And newbies easily jump to conclusions and assume that their IOIs mean they are ready to sleep with you. But when you get info, you can find out, for example, that she's underage. So geting info puts things in the proper perspective.
3.
Often girls will spontaneously offer info about themselves and their situation (for example, talking about her apartment and her roommate). In their mind, that is the equivalent of telling you that they are available, and structuring an oportunity for you. If you're not interested in that, they might assume that you just said "No thanks" in girlspeak. (Although girls don't give up that easily)
PS: Hey Dan. You were right. Being warm is better than being cool. Being truly interested in people is more satisfying than just using it a as a "technique".
A warm thank you!
being underage never bothered me. never... bitch.
Post a Comment